An Open Letter, to the Cat in Heat in my backyard.

Dear Cat,

I have 2 dogs, not cats. And they are girls. So they will not come out to jump your bones anytime tonight, or any other night for that matter. Please shut up.

I will let them out so they can scare you from here to Rte. 59 if you don't can it. But seriously dude, people are sleeping or trying to sleep here, and you are making too much stinking noise. I'm sorry you're not getting any hot loving. I can't help you out, so please stop making such a racket in my yard. Thank you.