Dr. Pediatric Surgeon has just left the surgery waiting room, after telling us that Jackson's procedure went well, and was uncomplicated.
We are waiting for the Murse that was attending Jack's surgery (why are all the night nurses boys?) to come get us so we can go be with our baby in recovery.
Today was one of the longest and hardest days of my life. Jackson's condition is something that develops in utero. So you know I spent a good part of this afternoon blaming myself. It happened while he was growing inside me. So it's my fault. Don't argue with my "logic".
After beating myself up mentally, I grew increasingly angry with the doctors. I remember the pediatric GI guy telling me in the exam room, in his haughty God-complex voice, "I'm a specialist. I see VERY SICK babies. Your baby doesn't look very sick to me."
Well, I say BULLSHIT HE WAS "NOT VERY SICK"!!!!!!
Tell me about how sick he isn't, when I'm rushing from the pediatric hospital to the surgery hospital, with my son's records and films in hand, ready to meet a surgeon I've only spoken to over the telephone once 10 minutes ago, so he can operate on my baby. TELL ME AGAIN HOW SICK MY BABY ISN'T.
ASSHAT.
It fills me with The Rage to think about it.
What an awful day. I'm so glad the bad part is over. It had better be over.
Please, God. Make the bad part over...
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
Somewhat calm after the storm
felicia Tuesday, December 05, 2006
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4 Responses:
Felicia I'm so sorry for how the last 24 hours have unfolded for you guys. I'm glad Jack has come through surgery well and is recovering.
You really should report that GI doctor. He had no right to make any sort of statement like that without doing tests and treating you and Jack like human beings. Man doctors make me nuts. They can be so haughty and so condecending. No mommy of a new baby should be treated like that. Ever.
We are praying for a fast recovery for Jack and for your nerves! Take care, try to get some rest.
I'm a complete stranger, having hopped over here from The Mama's site to check up on how baby Jackson is doing.
See, I have a baby Jackson as well. My Jackson has some reflux-ish issues, too, which had me worried for a while. I'm SO glad to hear that your little guy is recovering from surgery. Hopefully this will all be a distant, bad memory very soon.
Incidentally, our two older boys have hearing loss that developped in utero as well. Not life threatening, but I spent many a night blaming myself. Obviously I didn't eat well enough or take my prenatals regularly enough. No one could argue with my logic, either. But it's faulty, and I know you know that. You sound too smart not to know that.
You listened to your mother's intuition and you were right. You rock, mama. Hang in there *hugs*
I am so glad that Jack is recovering. You are one stron momma to not take no for an answer when you knew something was wrong.
Oh sweetie....I am SO sorry you had to go through all that!!! Those doctors should be shot! Little Jack is very blessed to have a mommy like you. We'll be praying that the worst is over.
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